One of the most complicated things to deal with as a parent is uncertainty. You never know if you’re doing the right thing for your child, and even when you’re pretty sure, there’s no guarantee.
You cannot guarantee that your child will be independent, that he will find suitable employment, and that he will not attach himself to the family home. However, you can put the chance in your favor if you apply the following guidelines.
Here are ten tips for raising an independent child
1. Let him do things alone
As a parent, wanting to help your child is so normal. However, helping him too much is not good for him at all.
Your child needs to take risks and initiatives alone and learn through failures. Your constant help deprives him of the opportunity to develop his autonomy.
The golden rule to follow is that if he can do it, don’t do it for him (but it’s still up to you to judge the circumstances that merit your intervention).
2. Offer him an appropriate environment
Children are very curious and seek autonomy early. Raising an independent child requires offering him an environment that promotes this autonomy. For example, from the age of three, let your child help with simple household tasks. This will help him develop his autonomy and learn new things.
3. Help him open up to the world
Being open to the world and others is an essential element of education because it is the soil of the values of openness and tolerance. Your mission as a parent is to explain the word to your child and teach him the knowledge of others.
4. Stimulate his desire to learn
To develop a child’s desire to learn, you need to let him do things on his own, without doing it for him. This allows him to reach his full potential and gain confidence in his learning ability. He is encouraged to exercise his new know-how alone, which allows him to develop new skills.
5. Be kind to him
The safer your child feels, the better he or she will be. If your goal is to raise an independent child, be consistent, and responsive, and let him know he can count on you.
6. Stimulate his creativity
All children have creative potential that they can develop and improve if we give them the opportunity.
In order to promote the creative potential of the child, it is better to let him play, invent and create in complete freedom without imposing our adult ideas or doing things in his place.
Encourage a creative environment on a daily basis where the child can play freely, dance, listen to music, build with cardboard boxes, paint, glue, draw, etc.
7. Be his role model
You are the first source of discovery for your child. He sees you, watches you, and quickly imitates you. That’s how he learns.
Your child has confidence in you. He’s imitating you because he thinks that’s the right way to do it. He observes your behavior, your reactions, and your ways of acting with others. He records your attitudes, and your words and he copies them. It’s a way to develop his identity.
He learns to make good gestures, such as washing his hands before meals and saying thank you or please. He may also imitate some of the less good things you do since you are his model.
8. Focus on his strengths
Today, many parental choices are based on competitiveness and the fear that their child will not be “at the same level” as others. We must not forget that your child is unique. He does not have to be like others. It is important to focus on his strengths and the development of his personal skills.
9. Cultivate optimism
There is a common misconception that optimism is an innate characteristic rather than an acquired one. Optimism can be developed. You can teach your child to develop a growth mindset and better manage negative events. Your optimism promotes optimism in your child.
10. Be present
Raising an independent child is a delicate process. You have to find the right balance between being present on one side and letting him alone on the other. Your intervention is necessary to promote the development of your child’s autonomy. You have to create an environment that allows him to feel confident enough to be independent.